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Audrey Clark - 'Outside Looking In'    For adult survivors of abuse everywhere
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Is this blog a waste of time?
Counting my blessings
I am here whether I blog or not
Put Abuse Survivors at the helm Mr Cameron
Two year old with methodone in her beaker cup


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My Blog

Is this blog a waste of time?

Life is busy. Social media often overtakes your life and while I try to make my visits to FB, Twitter and alike purposeful it's incredibly time consuming. I've been online most of the day with my new  -  a health benefit candle range  which is slowly but surely emerging.

This site is never far from my mind though often finding something purposeful to say is not so easy. I feel an incredible responsibility to those around the world who continue to support the site and in so doing me but never sure if what I say resonates with anyone.

Counting my blessings

It has been a full on couple of weeks here. My holistic centre and all things related have kept me busy. Once again I find my self apologising fordistributingg as much. There are over 250 posts here so do back track if i appear silent.

on the plus side my range of health benefit candles are almost ready. They are as beneficial to pets as well as humans. Talking of pets I am also disributing cool pet wear. So I am most certainly not sat still. Busy is good.

I have heard nothing from the PM David Cameron re my open letter but then I guess I never expected to.

I am here whether I blog or not

Often recently I feel I don't post enough. Sorry about that; Life does seem busier right now so when I blog I hope I blog with purpose. There are many, many blogs to peruse on here so you will never be bored!  I keep abreast of as many developments as I can and have very strong views on many a topic even if I don't always vocalise my opinions immediately.

I feel deeply saddened by this never ending can of worms. it's as though the lid was opened and now it cannot be closed and nor should it.

Put Abuse Survivors at the helm Mr Cameron

Dear David Cameron,

As an adult survivor of abuse and a former resident of a women's refuge I know only too well the sheer pain and angst one endures not to mention the shame and guilt as if in some way I was responsible for what happened to me. I never reported my father who abused me from the age of seven. He's now dead but my other abuser leads his life not twenty minutes from me.

Eighteen months ago I began my worldwide blog and a year ago I came out after writing my account.  For me it was an empowering experience but each day I am saddened by more abuse allegations.

Two year old with methodone in her beaker cup

Heard everything now. Methadone left in a child's beaker accessible enough for a two  year old to find and she did. She subsequently overdosed with enough substance in her to cause serious damage to an adult. What chance did she have? Drugs were more important to her parents than she was. Why put methadone in a child's beaker cup.? It's like leaving a loaded gun for a child to play with.

Her parents will now face their sentences knowing their daughter's death was wholly avoidable.

Time is such a precious commodity

Time is so precious on many levels, personal, professional and otherwise. We race through our day with a humungous list of chores. if you are like me you live by lists 9at least there's a chance some duties might get fulfilled. I guess that is where prioritising comes in. Opening At One Holistic Centre is taking up much of my time and that isn't even the face to face work. it's the behind the scenes work, keeping the admin cogs turning.

We get through each day and before we know it a tear has passed.

Tragic voice that was ignored

Here in Manchester many abuse cases not heard are likely to come to light and be investigated but the tragedy of this particular young woman upset me. We talk about disclosing. Tell someone. Don't be ashamed. It's not your fault. This young woman then aged thirteen wrote to Social Services telling them she had to do stuff wth mrn she didn't want t. They were older. She didn't even know their names. She was clearly distressed. She did what she was supposed to do yet there was no follow up.

Not enough hours in the day..!

You know..I want to apologise. I feel as though I am neglecting you all with my sparse posting at the moment but as you all know I am trying to get my new practice At One Holistic Centre up and running. It's mad but I know it will be worthwhile in the end and it's shaping up well. My commitment is as big as it has ever been. Every word I write is filled with emotion even if you cannot always feel it.
It is nearly a year since i took the monumental step to disclose publically surrounded by a wonderully supportive group of friends both old and knew in person and across the globe. I take inspiration often from the kind message from Dr Cathy Kezleman. A few moments of someone's time can bring much comfort to an abuse survivor. Can i take this opportunity to send my warmest wishes to Dr Cathy and her team and to send an early good luck message for Blue Knot Day this year. Ok. Off i go to do more!

Another D.J arrested ....

It makes me sad to hear of yet another D.J facing charges of sexual abuse. It makes even more difficult to take in as these guys are part of my era.

I listen a lot to those who say this is a celebrity witch hunt and though at times it must seem like that any individual suspected of abuse charges should be accountable. It's hard when you hear the devastating effect on those found innocent whose careers are over anre subsequently made bankrupt and often lose their home when faced with crippling legal bills but abuse is abuse and should never be tolerated.

What a year it has been

This time last year I was filled with trepidation at the launch of Outside Looking In and our succeis indeedsful Its Ok campaign which truly crossed the globe and brought the importance of feeling able to disclose abuse truly to the fore. We took away the shame. We made it OK. I am truly proud of that. My story became almost the by product being only 60% of the story. Perhaps one day soon I will tell the rest and finally lay the ghost of abuse firmly to rest.

I gave met the most amazing people from all walks of life.
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